Is this thing on?

I am days away from leaving for a country so far around the world that heretofore it has only existed in fleeting stereotypical images of Crocodile Dundee, boxing kangaroos, vast outback wilderness and cartoon Tasmanian devils. There is so much I am eager to see like clockwise flushing toilets, skillfully used boomerangs and wild marsupials. There are so many things I want to do like snorkel in the great barrier reef, go on a walkabout in the outback and drink a pint of piss (apparently a pseudonym for beer). It's allegedly an English speaking country, but after perusing some of the online term glossaries I am thinking of allocating a portion of my paltry salary to a full-time interpreter...you can just never be too careful in international travel.

Well now that I have documented the far-reaching stereotypes of a naive traveller we'll see what comes of this cultural exchange.